Weekly All In Featured!

Today's Weekly All In is featured on the Battle.Net Launcher on and the StarCraft homepage today!!!

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Woo hoo! It only took a year, but we finally got some serious recognition from Blizzard. Here's hoping for more in the future! :D <3

Drama: Cheating Is Bad, Folks

Another young and successful eSports kid bites the dust. If anything's going to destroy eSports, it's the players themselves. This article was published in The Weekly All In #42.

Drama of the Week: How to Save a Life: The Definitive Guide to Not Getting Caught Matchfixing

By: Mike Harrell

A few months ago, I had the incredible opportunity to attend BlizzCon in person for the first time. I saw all of my StarCraft heroes, from Neuro to Day9 to David Kim. Perhaps the greatest highlight of them all was coming within arm’s reach from Life on his walk to the stage for the Final match and then getting a high five from, and my badge signed by, sOs after his championship victory.

The thrill from the casters, and spectacle of the stage, and the excitement of the crowd is one of the best memories of my life, period. It’s still almost too good to be true. I have moments where I see a picture I took from the event and think “Wow. I really did that. I was really there.”  

Intrinsic v Extrinsic Enjoyment

As with all sport, there are the casual viewers that just want to see the action. The hits in football, the fights in hockey, the explosions in StarCraft. They eventually grow into more refined enthusiasts that notice the overall strategies and common tactics. One day, they may even develop an appreciation of minute details like altering a build order to get a unit out *just* in time, or turning a widow mine back on its owner.

However, the thrill of pure competition isn’t enough for some people. Sometimes, the desire to “make things interesting” goes well beyond a friendly bet, and can lead to not just a significant loss of money, but relationships, careers, and even freedom. This is the very reason that gambling is illegal in so many places, as the thrill of getting a quick return on investment can quickly carry a unwitting person to disaster.

In eSports, large-scale gambling operations have brought us nothing but missed opportunities, broken heroes, and a vague sense of inevitable ruin.

What’s Become of My Life?

In the StarCraft community, we are once again rocked by news that a popular and successful (and not even previously-successful, but currently successful!) player has been arrested in South Korea due to allegations of match fixing.

Just to clarify, this isn’t your run-of-the-mill bet. When we talk about match fixing, it means that the player has made an agreement with an organised crime ring to lose on purpose. Members of that ring then bet on the opposing player, the one sure to win, and make a huge amount of money. The player is then paid for “taking the fall” so that the rest of the ring could benefit.

Yes, organized crime. Like the Mob. Like how Al Capone used to fix boxing matches. It’s the exact same situation, except Savior didn’t have to get punched in the head for several rounds of boxing to make it convincing. Even worse, what may seem like a simple loss to a novice eye can be easily detected before the match even happens thanks to the computerization of betting and odds calculation. And who gets to go to jail when the player gets caught? The player. It’s illegal, it’s dangerous, and there’s no amount of money that will make up for the shame, personal destruction, and jail time that will make it worth getting caught.

It’s Time to Stop

In closing, I have prepared a set of guidelines to help players from getting caught match fixing. I hope that it will prove useful to players and team staff alike.

The Definitive Guide to not Getting Caught Matchfixing:

1. Never agree to lose a game on purpose for money. If someone approaches you about doing so, say no and tell your team management about the incident.
2. If a coach approaches you about losing a game on purpose for any reason, say no, and tell your team management about the incident.
3. If a teammate approaches you about losing a game on purpose for any reason, say no, and tell your team management about the incident.
4. If a close friend or family member approaches you about losing a game on purpose for any reason, say no, and tell your team management about the incident.
5. If someone calls you calls you and claims to be a Blizzard employee and tells you to lose a game on purpose, say no, and tell your team management about the incident.
6. If a shady dude stops you on the street and tells you he has a business proposition for you, say you’re not interested and tell your team management about the incident.
7. If you have reason to suspect your opponent or team member agreed to lose a game on purpose, tell your team management about the incident.
8. If your team management approaches you about losing a game on purpose for any reason, say no, and call the hotline to get yourself checked into KeSPA Jail.

The Future of StarCraft: Preparing the Next Generation

Every now and then I feel the need to write from the aspect of a parent of wants his child to like video games, and especially StarCraft. I feel it's only natural. 

If you've ever looked at a website for an expensive preschool, or even just heard of one, you'll know exactly where this article is coming from. It was first published in The Weekly All In #41. 

Drama of the Week: The Future of StarCraft: Preparing the Next GenerationBy: Mike Harrell

Disclaimer: I am writing this promotional article in exchange for moving my child up on the GosuSchool wait list.

Hello! And thank you for picking up this light introduction to “GosuSchool: The StarCraft Academy” the premier North American preschool for children ages 2 - 6. The facilities are unrivaled, philosophy of learning beyond reproach, and the star-studded faculty will provide your children with just the foundation they need to go on to the “Boxer School of Gifted StarCraft Youngsters” once they turn 7.

A New Kind of Education

GosuSchool was the first StarCraft-centric preschool of its kind and it remains the best in the world. From the time your child enrolls in the school as a Little Larva, until he or she graduates as a Zippy Zerglin’, your little nerd, or “Nerdling,” will gain invaluable cooperative and competitive experiences and learn in a world better than the real world: The StarCraft World.

Facilities

Each day, your child will march past the larger than life murals of StarCraft heroes, past and present, by renown StarCraft artist, Nicolas Chaussois. He will meet with his team and coach for a preview the day’s activities, and then set off on a brand new adventure of gaming-centric learning. When it’s time for lunch, custom PA recordings, courtesy of Robert Clotworthy, voice of Jim Raynor, will invite them to proceed to the cafe.  

White Ra’s Cafe, operated by the nicest and most paternal chef in the StarCraft community, boasts kid-friendly “Marine Meal” versions from the Slaughtered Calf Inn such as “Narud Nuggets,” “Dong RaGu Pasta,”  and “Raynor’s Raisins” with “Destructible Rock Candy” or “Baneling (Cake) Rolls” for dessert as well as Eastern European and Russian specialties as featured on White Ra’s Facebook page.

And that’s just the morning! Open-ended “Strategic Play” in the afternoon gives your child control of their games. They can choose to move up and down ramps, look up and down cliffs, and proceed at a steady pace from one end of the playground to the other. All “Strategic Play” is supervised and facilitated by highly-trained coaches, all of which are Twitch.tv partners and have completed a one year Early Childhood StarCraft Education cerification course.

Learning like a Gamer

Every day, your child will engage in varied activities to help them learn and grow to become the professional gamer you were hoping for. Activities Director Grubby will guide your child through physically and intellectually stimulating games like “Split the Marines” (shape and color sorting), “Mine the Minerals” (relay racing and circuit activities), and “Get the Watchtower” (climbing and communicating). All games are painstakingly designed by acclaimed Game Director, Dustin Browder, who is available 24/7 for all of your concerns, whether valid or not, via Twitter.

Also noteworthy are award winning Music Appreciation classes, featuring exclusive music* composed by legendary composer, Russell Brower, where children learn to use music to their advantage to immerse themselves more fully in their learning. You’ll see huge gains in your child’s APM as they hum, sing, and dance to new classics such as “Old Matt Horner Had a Farm,” “If You’re Gosu And You Know It,” and “Little Probe Beep.”

Special Programs

Beyond the outstanding daily activities, we boast one of a kind special programs. Each week, we have “Story Time with Morhaime,” where Blizzard President Mike Morhaime himself flies in on his Warp Prism and reads a story of his choosing to the children. Sorry, parents, kids only!

And don’t miss the dynamic schedule of future programs. Including: “Looking Like A Pirate for Fun and Profit” with Chris Metzen, “It Doesn’t Have to Be Complicated To Make Money” with Ben Brode, “Becoming A Cat Man” with Day9, and “When What You Thought Was Vespene Was Really BM.” with Zagara.

Just Click Play

Don’t wait a moment longer to reserve your child or future child’s place at GosuSchool: The StarCraft Academy. The wait list already extends for two years, so waiting until your child is born may be too late! Don’t be the parent that denies your child the premier preschool experience.

Financing options available.

*Digital download of “GosuSchool: Learning Like Winners” album available through Battle.net. Digital Deluxe edition includes exclusive the in-game World of Warcraft “Nerdling” battle pet, the surprisingly-generic exclusive StarCraft II in-game portrait featuring the GosuSchool logo, exclusive Diablo III “Nerdling” in-game pet and sigil, Heroes of the Storm exclusive “Nerdling” in-game skin for Murky, and exclusive in-game GosuSchool cardback in Hearthstone.

My favorite part of the this article is definitely story time with Mike Morhaime. Every time I see him speak or in an interview, I'm impressed by how much like a "normal" person he is. He's not glamorous. He's not particularly handsome or charismatic, But you can tell he's smart and that he cares about what he does and about other people, which is led to his success. I can totally picture him taking time out to read a story to children. And flying around in a Warp Prism, because billionaires can have nice things.

Drama: How to Improve Your Stream Viewership And Start Making Money: A 5-Step Guide for Guaranteed Success

This is one of those articles that sound funny, and then you write it and it just makes you sad. I totally stand by this guide as the best way to have success, but I obviously can't endorse using bots. It's deceptive and wrong. I even got some nagative feedback on this article because it seemed "too much like real advice" in addition to throwing in the bots. I guess that's just The Way Things Are.

This article was initially published in The Weekly All In #40.

Drama of the Week: How to Improve Your Stream Viewership And Start Making Money: A 5-Step Guide for Guaranteed Success

By: Mike Harrell

Twitch.tv, Azubu, DingIt, and that YouTube thing, as time goes on, more and more streaming platforms are launching and gaining viewers. There’s never been a better time to start your very own stream or to improve the stream that you already have!

As it’s the start of the new year, The Weekly All In is pleased to provide its readers with a fool-proof guide to drastically improving streaming viewership and monetary gains. The guide is short and simple, but you must follow it exactly. If there is any deviation from the guide, we cannot guarantee results. Also, it’s worth noting that the guide will work best if you have no personal or financial responsibilities.

Step #1: Set A Schedule During Prime Viewership Hours.

Peak hours on Twitch.tv are generally from 9am to 2pm (Pacific), with the middle of the week and the weekend getting the most views. Therefore, your stream must be up during those times. Set a public, posted schedule on your page.

Step #2: Interact With Your Viewers.

This is where you really get to shine as an entertainer. Provide commentary on your play, even if it isn’t particularly insightful. Make jokes. Tell stories. Pit viewers against each other or other streamers. Be active on social media. Whatever you want. It doesn’t matter if your viewers are idiots; you just need to give them a reason to watch.

Step #3: Monetize That Sucker.

Get allllllll the money things in there. Put a donation link on your stream. Have a robot read viewer messages attached to donations. Make donation goals that conclude in you dressing up sexy (this works better for women, but men have done it too). Make a great big list of people that donate, including hearts and winky faces by their names. ANYTHING that you think may motivate someone to send money your way, do it.

Step #4: Win Games

The real bane of all streamers: It helps if you’re good. That’s what will really, really keep people coming back: to see you win. Do whatever you have to do. It doesn’t matter if you’re smurfing all day every day at first, even for years, as long as you’re winning, people will watch. Once you actually get good, it won’t matter how long it took to get there.

Step #5: Use Bots

Now for the easy part: Use Bots. Hit up twitchviewbot.net, streambot.com, or viewbot.net, pick the package with the most viewers, and get it started. Don’t bother with “free” bots. It’ll be a scam and/or a huge pain the in butt.

Step #5 Part B: Really. Use Bots.

There are probably dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of other channels exactly like yours. How will you get more visibility? You need viewer numbers. How do you get that first big boost of viewers? Easily! Just use bots! No one on Twitch.tv has ever gone down due to botting. There is literally no downside. Sure, people may make fun of you, but you’ll be laughing all the way to the bank. Once you get that Twitch partnership, who cares what a bunch of freaks on Reddit say, anyway?

Step #5 Part C: Never, Ever, Acknowledge Using Bots

There is only one way that the public at large will ever know that you’re using view and chat bots: If you tell them so. Therefore, all you have to do is just never tell anyone. You can hide behind the possibility that someone else is sending bots to your stream in an attempt to make you look bad (LOL!). That would, of course, never happen. Bots cost money, and blowhards on the internet don’t pay for anything, much less pay for a month of Twitch Bots to troll streamers. Get out of here!

Step #5 Part D: Never Stop Botting

The naysayers and the accusers may scream, provide “proof” of your wrongdoing, and condemn you to the lowest circles of Hell, but that’s just free advertising. As long as you never admit to using bots, and never stop using them, you can always maintain the illusion of a “loyal following” that will keep you at, or near, the top position of your game. If you maintain your schedule, no one can ever prove that your bots aren’t your loyal viewers, tuning in just in time. It’s a perfect system.

As time goes on, real fans will begin to arrive and even stick around, and the longer you continue streaming consistently, the more of a staple of the community you become. Just remember: Reputation doesn’t matter. Numbers matter. If you’re getting viewers and getting money, you’re a successful pro streamer!

Drama: When Pro Gamers Retire

First appeared in Issue 37 of The Weekly All In

Some quick background: "Flash" is, more or less, the greatest StarCraft competitive player, ever. Period. He is frequently and unceremoniously referred to as "God" by many members of the StarCraft community (at least by ones that remember him from 5+ years ago). He was never so completely dominant while playing SC2, but he was always a force to be reckoned with. He's retiring from pro gaming as a player to fulfill the mandatory military service that Korea requires of him.

Some members of the SC community just don't get why/how players must move on from StarCraft, but it's a very real and common thing. This article was to try and explore the process that professional athletes go though as they come to terms with their decline in ability, and figure out what they're going to do next.

Drama of the Week: Retirement: When a God Fades Away

By: Mike Harrell

Flash announced his retirement from professional gaming this week, rocking StarCraft fans around the world. Some speculation informs us that Flash hopes to one day be the head coach of KT Rolster, but there is no indication of when that may happen, or of what Flash’s intended path to accomplish it may be.

Is It Really Retirement?

At 23 years old, “retired” seems like a strange word to describe Flash, or any other former pro gamer. But what does the elite StarCraft player do with himself (or herself, as we will hopefully be able to say before too long) once they’ve finished competing? At 28, I haven’t even entered my intended career yet. But by the time they reach my current age, the vast majority of pro gamers have peaked, declined, and then either taken up non-player roles in esports, moved on and faded into obscurity, or, worst of all, they put on bizarre outfits and create sad “entertainment” streams where they play on as a shadow of their former selves.

But then again, Flash won his first Premier tournament, the 2008 XNote GOMTV Star Invitational, at just 15 years old. Fifteen. What were you doing at fifteen? Probably about the same as I was: in high school, trying to not be scared of girls, and had a minimum-wage job in the summer. The notion of flying all around the world competing in video games for thousands of dollars had not yet even occurred to me..

Yet, Flash’s situation is hardly unique. History is repeating itself right now with Life and Maru, who are both currently just 18. Life won a GSL at 15 and is a BlizzCon champion. Maru won an OSL at 16, and just 6 months ago All-Killed KT Rolster in the Proleague playoffs, defeating Zest, Life, Stats, and Flash, one after the other. It stands to reason that both Life and Maru will continue to have impressive accomplishments for at least the next few years, just as Flash did.

Par for the Course

When will Life and Maru retire? Also at 23? If so, that gives them five more years. To put that in perspective, Wings of Liberty came out five years ago. When StarCraft II turns 10, will Life and Maru still be on the scene? We can only wait and watch, but one day, just as with all sports, even the current upstarts will eventually become a thing of the past.

But when they do, they will still have at least two-thirds of their lives ahead of them. It would be sad to even consider the idea that the greatest accomplishments of their lives occurred before they even turned 20. But what do professional gamers go on to do? Korean gamers generally have required military service, and sometimes, like Boxer and others, become coaches afterward.

Foreign players are just as enigmatic. Day9 got a master’s degree and now works at a game studio making an RTS. InControL is still on the EG roll in some capacity, but mostly commentates tournaments. Tasteless and Artosis have become legendary casters as well. Suppy’s floating around out there somewhere, going to school and competing on BaseTradeTV sometimes. And then there are players like IdrA who decided to go back to school and simply withdraw from StarCraft altogether.

More Than A Player: A Person

A large number of professional athletes of all sporting varieties become depressed after retirement. In fact, they say that a pro athlete dies twice, the first being the day they retire from their sport. Additionally, so many professional athletes go broke and even need to declare bankruptcy within just five years of their retirement that there is literally a book just for NBA players about how to manage salary and endorsement money during their career to make it last through the rest of their life. (It’s called “Winning the Money Game” by Adonal Foyle, an NBA veteran that eventually retired due to injury.)

After a lifetime of absolute dedication and maybe even incredible success, what is left? It’s a question that all pros ask themselves again and again as their retirement approaches and leaves them behind. Finances aside, many athletes struggle with identity, self-worth, and even dramatic changes in body chemistry as they look for new means of personal fulfillment and success. Competitive achievement is suddenly no longer their go-to source of serotonin. They have to find a new and more-rounded approach to life and success

So when a successful player feels like they’ve had enough of competitive training and competition, it’s actually in their best interest, financially, emotionally, and psychologically, to move on and pursue new avenues of interest.  And if they choose to remain part of the scene as a coach or commentator, that’s awesome! But we also cannot begrudge those that choose a different path, especially when that path is getting educated and starting a long-term career. You know, like anyone would at that age.

Fans: Continue Supporting Your Hero

When your favorite player gives up professional gaming, be disappointed, remember the good times, but don’t be mad. Nothing lasts forever, and your player needs your support now more than ever as they transition into a new career and a new lifestyle (especially if it’s a rocky transition).

And when they find that new career, be happy for them! There’s no reason their next 50 years can’t be just as incredible as the first 25, even if it’s not by pwning noobs every day.

BlizzCon 2015

I went to BlizzCon this year.

It was awesome. I was able to watch the majority of the StarCraft events as well as some other things. My wife and 1 year old came out to California with me so it could be a bit of a mini-vacation for us all, and it ended up being a really, really good time!

I went to provide coverage for The Weekly All In, naturally. We didn't have press access so I mostly contented myself with getting good photographs for the articles that would eventually be written for our BlizzCon Special issue.

It was awesome to really get behind the camera again. I took a photography class in high school and dabbled with it and photoshop a little here and there for the following few years. This was the first time in years I really made an effort. I was using a borrowed camera (my wife's grandpa's digital Rebel). and really did my best to get in there to get the good shots. I figured this may be my only chance to got to BlizzCon, or do press coverage of an event, or get photographs in a magazine (even a digital one), so I should really go all out. 

While I am definitely an amateur, and my shots reflect that, there were a few that turned out really well. I'm putting some of my favorites here. There is (or will shortly be) a link to the rest in the sidebar.

You watch BlizzCon at home on twitch (or maybe you don't, it could go either way) and it's really fun and exciting. But when you're there, in a room with tens of thousands of nerds and  you're 15 feet from the stage, it's incredible. One of the single coolest experiences of my life. More fun than turning doughnuts in the snow as a teenager. More exciting than the time I possibly caused  increased security on the Haitian-Dominican boarder. 

Mike Morhaime, Founder and President of Blizzard and all-around good guy. This was probably my first photo of the event that was actually in focus. Such a cool guy. Glad I at least got one good shot.

Eric Dodds, lead designer of Hearthstone.Again, I'm just so happy that it looks half decent.

Chris Metzen. VP at Blizzard. All around bad@$$. Possibly a pirate.

The Future of StarCraft panel, with all of those guys that people like to threaten on forums. A pretty well-framed shot, if I say so myself.

Manuel "Grubby" Schenkhuizen. One of my StarCraft heroes that is now a commentator for Heroes of the Storm. Such a nice guy. Really happy with the lighting and the pose on this one.

Lim Yo-hwan, or "BoxeR" as he is often known, is something of a StarCraft legend in the professional scene. He dominated competition for years back in the Brood War days. Very exciting to get to see him in person.

Dan "Artosis" Stemkoski and Nick "Tasteless" Plott. The bromance between these long-time StarCraft nerds runs deep. I wish there had been an opportunity to met them personally, but I'm glad to have gotten a few good shots all the same. 

Chris "HuK" Loranger (center) and Jang "MC" Min Chul. Huk was my very first StarCraft hero, and one of the few that still actively play. The only problem is that he usually looks kind of pissed, for like the last three years. I was really excited to not just see him (and MC!) in person up close, but to get a pic of him looking genuinely happy about something.

The stage for the StarCraft competition was awesome beyond words. Three screens (two for a POV of each player, and one for an observer's perceptive). The stage was mostly just a white, blocky, frame. However, ~40 projectors would simulate an animated stage that changed for each map and each race, complete with victory animations. This is a shot where Life, a Zerg player, won a match, so the stage exploded with a green acid effect. 

Kim "sOs" Yoo Jin kissing the trophy after winning the tournament. Possibly the best photo I have ever taken, or will ever take. This shot is completely unedited.. I'm super proud of it. I also had to kneel on the cement floor in front of the stage for about an hour to be up close for the opportunity to get it. Worth it.

My editor and one of the other writers really drilled the importance of getting good photos of the eventual winner into me. After about 100 shots of sOs right here up close, about two feet away, I realized that I hadn't actually had a fan moment yet. I hadn't given him a high five or get anything signed or anything. So I stopped taking photos (and got the camera out of his face) and got the high five and got my badge signed.  Such an incredible day.

Between games, I would check in with the rest of The Weekly All In guys to say what pics I got and ask if there was anything I should be looking out for. Near the finals, they started to say that they could see me on the stream (!!!). I haven't gone through and watched all of the event just to look for me, but I knew I'd definitely be at this part and one other. Can you see me? 

This one's a little easier.

But this one's my favorite. LOL!

Drama of the Week: Lilbow’s Poor Life Planning

This article is pretty self-explanatory. Lilbow did something super dumb and then everyone made fun of him for it. 

Drama of the Week: Lilbow’s Poor Life Planning - Dumps BlizzCon and GirlfriendBy: Mike Harrell 

The StarCraft community was shocked and appalled this weekend when Lilbow announced via Twitter that he did not prepare for his matches in the WCS Global Finals. He stated that it would be a better use of time to play Legacy of the Void after his victory at WCS Season 3, as he was very unlikely to beat Life in the round of 16 or Innovation in the round of 8 at BlizzCon later this week anyway.  

Even more astonishing, is that after interviewing his family and close friends, it is apparent that this behavior is becoming a habit for Lilbow. 

Last week, the night before Lilbow left France for California to compete in the WCS Global Finals, Lilbow dumped “Emma” (name has been changed), his girlfriend of over three years. The dumping occurred at a lavish family party, where many were expecting Lilbow and Emma to announce their engagement. Lilbow, however, had more ambitious plans. He separated himself from Emma entirely, citing a need to focus on the current object of his affections: Taylor Swift.  

No Tact from Lilbow 

“Judging me badly on a situation that u probably can't understand isn't something nice from you,” posted an indignant Lilbow on his Facebook page. He went on to explain that while Emma and he have enjoyed a very successful and fulfilling relationship over the past three years, that did not justify his continued efforts. If he was going to get anywhere with Taylor Swift, he needed to get started right away.  

Indeed, just hours before the party he tweeted his lack of intent towards Emma, “i know its Emma and its important but well, i didnt wanted to spend months planning for one wedding while i can plan for 5+ years.” However, it appears that his family should not have been surprised, as just before the bombshell tweet, he announced that “it would probably hurt if this party had any sense to me but as i said i saw Emma 2 times the past 3 months.” 

Yet, the lingering concern remains: why would Lilbow leave a satisfying and fulfilling relationship with Emma in favor of a currently-nonexistent relationship with Taylor Swift? Why wouldn’t he seek to enjoy the opportunity he has right now? Emma, by all accounts, is a fun, engaging, and all-around balanced woman who has stolen the hearts of, sources say, over a million people. And why would he announce the separation in such a way? Why not just remain silent? Why would Lilbow choose to publicly disrespect Emma and her family, especially when so many would give anything to be in his place?  

A Feint of Heart 

Unfortunately, Lilbow made yet another public statement regarding the true source of his interest in Emma: her popularity. “I don't wanna be the best match for a girl that nobody is pursuing anymore, it doesn't make any sense to me.” Yes, it appears that Lilbow has had a lifetime pass for the hype train all along. Despite Emma continuing to progress into what some say is a nearly perfect woman in her own right, Lilbow is only interested in ladies that make headlines. 

Many would argue that a marriage to Taylor Swift in the next five years could be a case of Lilbow setting an unrealistic goal. Swift, a 26-year old American singer, trendsetter, and Instagram enthusiast, is 6 years older than Lilbow and has millions of fans and admirers all around the world. It seems very unlikely that she would take particular interest in Lilbow, even if he got a chance. 

Lilbow, however, was adamant of the potential for marital bliss. “I decided to spend all my time on Taylor and I reached top 5 upvotes on global fanpage so far….I know what I want and if I have to look bad a party for it, then it's too bad.”  

An Uncertain Future 

While Lilbow’s effort is obviously genuine and intense, who can trust his level of commitment? What happens when, by succession or choice, Swift fades from the spotlight? Will Lilbow, again, move on to the next woman, despite Swift still having plenty to offer in terms of their relationship? We will probably never know, as the likelihood of Lilbow forming a serious relationship with Swift after his treatment of Emma is far from certain, or even likely. 

Returning to reality, why in the world would Lilbow broadcast that he was making only a minimum effort for the WCS Global Finals, likely the most prestigious event he will ever take part in, because he wanted to be ready for the release of Legacy of the Void? It’s been less than two months since Lilbow’s $30,000 1st place victory in Kraków. It’s extremely unlikely that 6 weeks of laddering on an ever-shifting beta will raise him to heights in Legacy of the Void beyond playing at BlizzCon in Heart of the Swarm.  

Lilbow’s decision and the manner of its announcement displays a shameful lack of respect for his opponents, fans, and sponsors. It shows that the best of foreign players are unwilling to face challenges and are unworthy of serious consideration in top-tier competition. Lilbow chose to forgo competition in the largest event of his life and frame it as though he’s preparing for some future competition of greater consequence.  

Granted, it’s true that his chances of success were low and his means of preparation were very poor. But that doesn’t change the fact he, as a professional gamer, chose to broadcast his lack of intent to play the best he could. Using LotV as a shield does not excuse the action.  

I have bad news for Lilbow and his supporters. If he’s unwilling to honestly compete against the best players in the world when he has the opportunity now, we have no reason to assume that he’ll come through in the future, either.

So yeah... if Lilbow makes it into the top 16 of the WCS Global Finals at any point during Legacy of the Void, I'll eat my firstborn. Such a disappointing cop out.

MiniDrama: President Obama Changes Name of the Disrupter

Better late then never.

As part of his first, and probably only, trip to the state of Alaska, President Barack Obama has officially renamed the Disruptor back to its native name of "Reaver."

"Well you know," Mr. Obama said in an exclusive interview with The Weekly All In, "I figured I was on a roll with Denali, so I might as well keep going. These kinds of things take forever when you try to go through official channels. I figured I might as well knock out a few more while I'm at it. Look out 'Mid to High Masters' players, you're next!"

Hundreds of thousands rejoice at the announcement. One forum poster said "All we ever wanted was the Reaver to begin with. I'm so glad that Our President was able to make it happen. The Disruptor just wasn't going anywhere and they keep making it more and more like the Reaver. Might as well just call it that!"

However, not all are pleased with Obama's decision, nor the way in which he chose to enact it. "It is not the place of the President to just up and make decisions about StarCraft II: Legacy of the Void," responded a Blizzard spokesperson, "I don't care if it's hugely popular and what we should have just done all along, or if players have been calling it the Reaver for months, HE doesn't get to decide! And what about the disparity in unit models? What can possibly be done to reconcile the difference?"

We will continue to post updates as they come through, but it looks as though the change is here to stay. Players seem well-pleased with the change. One incredibly lucid and believable player wrote, "Yeah...every since it changed, I just 'get' it now. I know how to harass with it. I know where it fits into the army composition. Turns out it really was all in a name. The Reaver has just really come together now."

President Obama continues his trip in Alaska for another couple days. Should he make any more announcements about Blizzard games, you'll hear about it first at The Weekly All In!

I wrote this some weeks ago when the Weekly All In was on a brief break. I could have just posted it more or less as it is, but I wanted to photoshop some pictures of Pres. Obama in front of Exit Glacier with little Reavers and Distruptors on it. Unfortunately, I never got around to it, and then I missed the window for the joke to be relevant in any way.

I've still not gotten around to it, but I'm tired of seeing it just sit around. So now it's here. I hope you enjoyed it.

Ded Gaem: Hacked article and details

The Weekly All In continues on its break while Nicolas has some other projects to finish.

Anyway, this is the article from issue 28. Notes and commentary about the article's evolution are at the bottom.

A wave of crippling panic has swept over the nation, nay, the world in the last few weeks as hack after hack exposes the secrets that ne'er-do-wells all over thought could never be discovered. The most recent of these hacks targeted none other than our favorite StarCraft personalities in their Ded Gaem mansion, lovingly referred to as “Sanctuary,” in southern California.

Only Vague Responses from Blizzard

“We are aware of the situation and we are already working on a fix for it,” stated an official spokesmen from Blizzard’s department of non-game game-related content. “We’ve begun internal testing on the matter and we’ll have the fix out soonTM.” This response has, understandably, not done much to alleviate the worries of the “Ded Gaem” gamers.  

“If I wanted the entire world to read my emails, I’d just let TigerLily back on my computer” lamented a livid Destiny. “I can’t understand the incompetence of Blizzard on matters like this. How could the house be hacked? Why wouldn’t they be monitoring our security? Why would they allow some creep to just park across the street and hack into our network and steal all of our information? I’m going to have to change ALL of my passwords! Do you know how long that’s going to take? I was on the phone with a Blizzard tech support guy earlier today, I’ve never talked so fast in my life, and that STILL didn’t fix it!”

Private Lives Exposed

Some of the gamers were pretty forthcoming with the information that was stolen. “Yeah, it’s a shock, but I’ve got nothing to hide,” said a beaming DesRow. “I’ve been very good since we started living here at Sanctuary. The only thing they’re going to find from me is a whole bunch of Reddit traffic and some StarCraft things. I worry about WinterBOT though. He’s made a the tough decision to use his “Dirty Ded Gaem Dollars: The Reality Show Currency” to become a real, human, boy and he’s done a lot of research into it here on our network. I really feel for the guy, he wasn’t ready to make it public yet.”

Other gamers were not so eager to have their recent activities revealed. It could even disrupt the future of their careers. “Yes, it’s all very upsetting,” Naniwa was overheard saying on the phone, while I listened from the bushes near his open window. “They were getting everything. All of our Skype convos. All of our emails. All of our search history. Pretty soon the entire internet’s going to know about the gourmet cupcake shop I’ve been planning. ‘Nani’s Nummies’ will never be a success without the proper marketing and now it’s ruined!”

His voice began to crack, as did my knees, but he continued, “They even got all of the get-well-soon DM’s I sent to Jimmy Fallon when he injured his finger. EVERYTHING.” He must have moved away from the window at this point, because I couldn’t hear anything else. This was just as well, however, as my feet had begun to fall asleep. On a clarifying note, I’m just nosey, not the hacker. I can hardly format a Reddit post.

Irreparable Damage

So far, the following shameful secrets have been dug up about each of the gamersDesRow: Apparently sent a lovely card to each Rifkin and Zombiegrub after Hell It’s Aboot Time.WinterBOT: Had the foresight to renew his warranty for the next two years. Research into becoming a real boy. Many viewings of “Pinocchio” on Netflix. Naniwa: Baking sites. Weekly emails to his mother so she doesn’t worry.Destiny: Correspondence indicating that he’s been volunteering at a homeless shelter and after school programs for low-income children who want to learn technical skills.TigerLily: Due to her unfortunate habits of sharing personal information, there was literally nothing that the hackers uncovered that she had not already make public herself. 

Reputations on the Line 

“We fully understand the potential fallout from this kind of situation,” the Blizzard spokesperson reiterated, “if word gets out that the online persona of these guys is really just a persona, it could be cataclysmic to their careers. What would Destiny be if he weren’t just a foul-mouthed fast-talker on the internet, but really a normal do-gooder on the side? Catastrophe! We’re going to find who did this, and then we’re going to say that we’re going to do something about it!”

Blizzard Taking a Firm Stance

When I pressed for clarification on what would happen to the hacker(s), I was interrupted by a man dressed all in blue, leaning on a blue post, who seemed to be making the same, somewhat unnatural movement over and over. He didn’t look at me when he spoke, but passed me. He said, “The user who did this will be banned, in accordance with the User End License Agreement that he or she agreed to at the time of purchase of the Ded Gaem Gawker and Paparazzi Parking Pass and Virtual Ticket. They will not be allowed near the premises of Sanctuary again.”

I asked what would happen if the hacker were to just purchase a new parking pass and do the whole thing over again, but the blue person remained silent despite being asked multiple questions for clarification until another reporter asked what would happen to the in-game items that had been bundled with the pass of the hacker once they were banned.

The Blue Man replied, “The forthcoming in-game items bundled with the Ded Gaem Gawker and Paparazzi Parking Pass and Virtual Ticket, namely, The World of WarCraft TigerLily Skype Battle Pet, The Real Boy Winter Hearthstone cardback, The Destiny Story of the Good Samaritan skin for The Lost Vikings in Heroes of the Storm, The DesRow Still Competes In Things StarCraft II Portrait, and the Naniwa’s Nummies ‘Better Than Whimsyshire Cupcake’ Health Globe reskin for Diablo III will all be removed from their account unless they create a new account and repurchase the bundle.”

No further questions were taken.

I had a pretty hard time getting this article finished. I knew I wanted to do something involved with the revelation of incriminating personal information in the wake of the Ashley Madison hack. My first thought would be to use the names of some of the StarCraft Reddit trolls emails hacked to reveal all of the nice things they say in the personal correspondence, and that would be the "scandal." But after thinking about it a bit, it didn't seem like enough for a whole post.

Thinking about it a bit more, I looked into the approach of having their GGTracker accounts "exposed" to reveal that none of them actually play the game anymore, and when they did, all they did was hokey stuff, like the WoL campaign on easy and 6-pooling every matchup. I even did my very first Twitter tease image for it to try and drum up what little hype I could.

But then that got more complicated, because it turns out that not only are pretty much all replays on GGTracker public, but you can even import them into Spawning Pool to see what builds they used. So at this point there wouldn't even need to be a hack, unless the hackers got information through Battle.net for some reason, which seemed like a whole new can of worms.

After some more brain storming with my wife, I decided it would probably be the most-entertaining and least convoluted if I used real StarCraft personalities, and went back to the "nice" scandal, which lead directly into a second Ded Gaem article.

I didn't want to do that at first, as it seemed like too much of a rehash, not to mention the fact that none of the people in the Ded Gaem had actually caused a stink lately (the original leaked info for TigerLily was "Meh. Who cares?" because I couldn't think of a single thing to say about her). Plus, it was like 11:30 PM on Sunday and there was no way there could be good art done in time.Eventually, I decided just to get it done because we had a release to Prod the next morning at work and I needed to get this sucker over with.

Much to my surprise, I think it turned out pretty well. I really like the idea of Destiny doing a lot of community service and volunteering in outreach programs when he isn't straming. I have never interacted with directly with Destiny before, so I honestly don't know much about him other than what he chooses to portray online. I also generally assume that people are Good until proven otherwise. So the thought of him having a double life of do-goodery is a happy thought.

I'm also super proud of that "blue post" personified bit at the end. I'm not sure the execution was that great, but I feel like that's a good new source of material. I really liked the parking pass idea too, because it really tunes right into the Cross-product marketing that Blizzard has (understandably) been pushing more and more.

I'm not so happy with WinterBOT in this article. I really wanted to work him in more, as opposed to just informing the reader through other people. However, I didn't have time to really do him justice. Originally, I wrote that he was scheduling surgery to "transition" into a real boy, but decided to change it in favor of the safer option. My last article was about gender issues in StarCraft, it didn't seem like a good idea to jump back into it again.

Anyway, that's the story of this article. Thanks for reading, and tell your friends about The Weekly All In!